These are the ground rules if you are going to be my sort of. every once in a while facebook friend. No asking me about my love life. No telling me about yours. No talking about shagging around. No references to our past. No references to our sexual past. Do not try and talk to me as if I am the same person. I’m not. What happened changed me and growing in to myself has changed me. No flirting. No asking for naked pictures (if you wanted them that badly then you wouldn’t have gotten rid of the real thing. Or the pictures you already had). Basically just leave sex, the past, shags/new gf’s out of it.
These aren’t completely constricting rules and yes it might mean that if you are going to chat to me then you are going to have to be creative in what we talk about but hinting that you would like to sleep with me again, that you would like naked pictures, referring to yourself as the ex and thinking thats fine to do, is not acceptable. And will probably never be acceptable. So if you actually truly want to be my friend you won’t get pissy about this, you won’t dismiss me as a ‘crazy’ woman, you will just abide by these few simple rules without complaint. Or you can fuck off and leave me alone.
Now if only I could get him to sign a copy of this…..
I know I wouldn’t need these rules if I wasn’t still hurt or if I wasn’t in love with him anymore. I know that he won’t understand why I need these rules because he hasn’t had feelings for me for a long long time. I know by imposing these rules he will probably realise (although this is ex chop were talking about) that I do still have feelings and he will run a million miles away from the situation (which honestly might be the best thing to happen). But I don’t care. I need these rules. He was being all jokey and flirting on facebook and went to write something about sleeping with people now he had a new place and I was just sat there frozen, staring at the screen, whispering don’t. Don’t finish that sentence. Don’t say what I know you are going to say. Don’t talk to me about you being with someone else. Please don’t hurt me like that. Luckily he wrote something completely different which even made me laugh but this is why I need the rules. So I’m not panicking over what he may or may not say to me. He asked me how the boys in AK are and I actually said back to him, sorry but I’m not going to talk about new guys in my life with the guy who was my life. Ok, not in those words but the gist was the same. He then made a joke about seeing me naked and again I said sorry, you lost the right to see me naked when you left me and yes this time I said it in so many words. I meant it. I meant I’m not talking about new guys in my life with him and I’m hoping he gets the hint and will not try that shit with me.
All I want is for him to be like look, I made a mistake, I’m still in love with you, I want you back and I will do anything to make it happen. And then I want him to say by the way, I’ve had to move back home cause I bought a ticket to Alaska. I’m staying at the Westmark and I’ll be here for two weeks. Come see me.
Is that little fantasy so hard to ask for? I don’t even need the I’m in Alaska bit. Just the I’m in love with you, lets make this work, you’re mine and I’m yours part.
I really don’t think thats to much to ask for. Right?