Aha, so was stressing about the whole cinema job thing but I’ve really wanted to show that I am being an adult and thinking about whats important so kept it and told them about my availability changes but didn’t quit, just said I could do fri-sat. Ok they said but then didn’t schedule me for last week and then today I get home and there’s a nice little letter firing me. Jokes! So now I get off of the second job thing scot free instead of just quitting and pissing dad and Kim off. Very happy course of events.

Job as Associate Editor is still great. Yeah, its a bit stressful having to juggle allll the different parts of my job plus all the bits of the Office Manager, plus being the go-to girl for everyone else and its even worse when I’m all fluey but its a good kind of stressful. The kind where you know you’re achieving something and are proud of it. I caught a massive printing error that saved the company thousands, I’ve booked signings for a book none of the sales people can shift, I’ve managed to navigate myself around bloody Indesign (bloody Indesign!! I never thought I’d see the day!). I’m proving to myself that I’m not a fuck up! That’s probably the best thing of all; I’m starting to feel like the good me again. The one who people are proud of, the fun one, the one who wants to jump around the house. I’m not saying I’m not massively tired at the end of the work day and can be a bit snappy and I’m not saying that I don’t get a bit flustered when the work is piling up a bit but I’m not going to pressure myself in to being perfect yet. I’m just taking it as it comes right now.

It’s just nice to be recognising some of me again


Week 1

Finished my first week at Todd Communications and I honestly loved it. Love love loved it, I’ve got my office and my work I can just get on with, I get to talk to authors and publishers, I get projects that when finished are going to have my name on them in print. In print!! I will physically be able to buy things with my name on them; I’ll be a household name! Aha. Right now its a bit slow so it is a bit easy but thats fine with me, just means I get to be able to train up with no hecticness and then it will get busy and I can’t wait. I actually can’t wait to really know what I’m doing and to be able to get on with it without being the new trainee. The editor, lets call her scotsgirl, is amazing. She really knows what shes doing and is really nice and I just like her. She makes me a bit homesick cause we can go off on a tangent about things like new look and primark and she knows what ann summers is!! I look forward to her being my friend. And then there is a boss lady who is a few years older than me and reminds me a lot of treacle. Everyone is really nice. I’m sort of stressing about the cinema job cause I said to the family that I would keep it and work friday after TC and saturday but I really honestly do not want to. I was so shattered by the end of this week and I know I should be earning as much as possible but I’m now at a full time 8am-5pm job at good pay; I just don’t want to push myself to far when by the end of the week my back is pretty damn sore from being at a desk and I feel like I deserve to have my weekend. I’m in a real grown up job for fuck sake, I am not going to want to go from that to the cinema and be dead on my feet. Plus when moo gets here I want to be able to have my weekends so we can do stuff. I’m really disappointed about HAP as well, there is just no way I can do it unless I say that while moo is here I can’t and then before and after I can do weekends and work with chick. To be honest I really don’t know how I’m going to work that one out but I have a few months so I’m sure I’ll think of something.

New prognoses; severely vitamin d deficient and hypothyroid. So basically I need to take some pills to help with how my body absorbs nutrients for my bones and also energy. Which I could have told them but oh well! I also apparently do not ovulate at all so need to take something to trick my body in to having a period. Again, something I already knew. I’ve come to terms with the whole infertile thing, I’ve just never really felt that chidlers were in my cards. I just hope I can find a guy who is cool with that and would rather be a cool godparent or uncle.

Can’t wait for work on monday 🙂

Associate Editor

The last interview I did was for an associate editor position at this publishing house. I don’t know why, I applied more just for the hell of it and then got an interview and thought fuck it so went. Didn’t think much would come of it, i mean this is a job I actually wanted; a career job that was the reason for taking my degree. Even dad was confused as to why I’d bother and said I wouldn’t get it. The interview went ok I thought, I was there for over an hour which seemed like a lot of time to waste on someone they weren’t really considering. I was told that they would get back to me within a week and off I went on my merry way. Well, up yours everyone, HA dad! The very next freaking day I was told I had the job!! Firstly thank god, cause the whole starbucks/cinema thing was really dragging me down; I just know I’m better than being some minion slaving away for minimum wage and even after two shifts at the movies my back has been starting to complain. I just can’t believe it, I really can’t believe that I get to work with books and authors and have my own cubicle and be an actual grown up with a grown up job! For the first time in a long time I’m proud of myself and feel like someone has actually seen my worth and is giving me a break. So I start tomorrow after a pap appointment which I am just oh so excited for aha. Just got to make sure I’ve got my big girl outfit all ready to go!