Disbelief

I really can’t believe I came all the way back to see ex mr chop and it isn’t going to happen. I’m not going to see him. I’m not going to get that chat I’ve wanted since he left, I’m not going to see truth in what he’s told me over the years. It’s not just not going to happen either, it’s very clear from this that it won’t ever happen. It’s so disappointing.

It’s a good thing I’m going back next week, I’ve caused enough problems by being here as it is. Farmer boi is all mixed up in me and imagining a future that will never happen, once again being a bad seed for the ex ex, bro is pissed that I’ve had my old room while being here, had way too much ‘family’ time.

Finally met mr moo. I can see why she likes him and he definitely made an effort for my being there and was very hospitable. I don’t necessarily like the way he talks to her sometimes and he has a very obvious controlling side to him. But he has stood by her through everything she’s been going through and for that I am grateful to him.

Brighton this weekend which will be a laugh. Then a week and I am back to my reality

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