Starting Over Again

So the HAP season is nearly over, everyone is nearly gone and I have done two (minor, not complete) shifts at my new job as cashier at the Bear’s Tooth. So far? Kind of not loving it, there’s a lot to learn, a lot to take in, constantly on the move, totally being rushed through training (which I am being a bit of a failure at to be honest) and haven’t really made any sort of connection with anyone. The only people who have really deigned to talk to me are the team leader people cause they have to; they’re the ones training me. I’ve really been trying to be friendly and open to everyone I’ve run in to but so far I’ve just not impressed the beer puller at all, scared off a fellow cashier, pissed off the point person and been ignored by pretty much everyone else there. I think the fact that HAP, which is a job I’ve really loved doing, is over in a few days and then all the people I’ve met and friends I’ve made are going so I’m feeling just a little more fragile than usual and sad that I’m now going to be in a job with none of my people. I just also really don’t know if I can hack it in this one, there aren’t room for a lot of mistakes which just makes me feel really pressured and everyone just expects me to get on with it even though I don’t know what the fuck I am doing. Also been feeling really homesick, miss my moo, miss bournemouth, miss being a student, miss being able to be independent without it being to hard, miss life.

But I’ve made my mistakes and made my decision so got to stick to it I suppose


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