I have a date tomorrow and I’m not going to lie, I am totally 100% definitely NOT ready for it! I am so heavy yet empty inside and I don’t want to go. I don’t want to be with someone or try and make an effort with someone who isn’t you. I can’t do this, I can’t start again because I just want my boyfriend back and its so pointless! Such a waste of time wanting you back and waiting for you so why shouldn’t I move on? Its not fair to start anything, even one date with someone when I’m still in love with someone else.
But I will be damned if I stay the lonely heartbroken girl and I will be damned if I’m going to sit here still pining away while you’re out there getting with other girls.